This Crazy Thing We Call Life!

Sometimes I have to make decisions about my life. And those decisions are hard and they scare me and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think I have an answer and then a few days later I am doubting and second guessing everything that I think I  have figured out. It's so not cool. And above all I can't handle that fact that I don't know what I am supposed to do! How do I figure this out? How do I know if I am making the right decision? How? How do I know what it is that I am supposed to do? My life is a tad jumbled and messy right now.

It's 2 in the morning. I am sitting alone in the dark in my room on my bed. My roommate is in the other room watching a movie with her boy. The tv is loud, so I know exactly which part of the movie they are at. Batman Begins is a pretty great movie. For whatever reason the whole situation is just making me think about my life. I miss people. A lot. And I don't have tons of friends, so that is cool I guess, but whether it's been a week or a year since I saw you last I miss people in my life. I am not the girl who goes on dates all the time (or ever really...) I am not the girl who watches movies on the couch with a boy who is interested in me because I am not really the girl who guys become interested in. Which is fine. I am not upset about it at all and in all honesty it's probably my own fault. But I bring it up because I am sitting here on my bed...listening to Batman, knowing that my roommate is cuddling with a boy on the other side of the wall. And it just reminds m

chap stick letters people who make me laugh surprise visits milk delicious food smiles rain people who laugh at my jokes sleeping in a cozy bed reading a good book naps naps naps movies people who make me feel loved checking the mail rainbows belts sunshine cuddling mountains thanksgiving peaches and cream oatmeal family the bond between sisters inside jokes jokes in general understanding concepts in class harry potter rings texas photography helping people cooking eating fishing blogs hiking going on drives trucks listening nature cold cereal camping wearing hats music late night chats roommate adventures tandem bikes jumping in leaves rainboots sunsets hot chocolate laughing The Gospel of Jesus Christ basketball with my brothers love sports pumpkin pie socks workout clothes running blessings The Scriptures general conference puppies brushing my teeth people who are just genuinely good summertime snow cones guitar g

Sometimes I feel like I have no control over anything in my life. Sometimes I get frustrated at everything, including my upstairs neighbors who are quite often loud people. And sometimes I just struggle with things. That is when I vacuum. We have a rug. It's cream. It's nice and soft and makes the room look better. Except for when it is filthy, which I feel like is most the time because hey, we live here and we walk on the rug, and we're girls so our hair sheds (especially mine) and so it makes sense why the rug gets dirty. And usually it doesn't bother me. Except when I like to vacuum. And then all of a sudden I find myself, unable to control the noisy neighbors, or homework in classes, or decisions in my life, on my hands and knees vacuuming the rug. This rug that is still soft and nice and still cream. And in a few days it will be dirty again and I will just keep walking by. But for now, the rug is clean and my life does not seem like it's spinning uncontrollably

I absolutely love this quote! I think I have even talked about it before but ohh well. I am so grateful for my life and the people who are in it! I am grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ and for a loving Father in Heaven. I will write more later because I don't have much time before conference starts again, but I cant get over how incredibly blessed I am! The best certainly is yet to come!

Sometimes you just need a hug. Sometimes a hug from a certain someone would make everything so much better. And sometimes that person is a million miles away. Unfortunate.