I Miss You.

Today, I find that this post could be written to many different individuals. I have been blessed with quite a few spectacular individuals in my life, and whether or not they understand how amazing they are to me or whether or not they realize this post could be for them, I miss many of them dearly. But today this is for someone special. Someone I said goodbye to a while ago, who I wont see for a very long time. Someone I think about more often then anyone really knows. Someone I love and miss with all my heart. This is for you.

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I walked in. My heart started pounding.

It still smells the same but I know things are different. 

I was so much younger the last time I was here.
So naive, with so much to learn.

And you were here. It was the last time I saw you. The last time I stepped foot in this house.

And now I find myself here again.

In your home.

Which I guess is now my home as well.

And I don't really know how to handle it because it is hitting me all over again that you are gone.

And I miss you. 

I miss the way you would create things constantly.

I miss your quiet soft embrace, and your frail hands that always seemed to be busy working on something.

I miss your smile, and your laugh!

I'm not sure I could tell you the last time I saw them but the memory of them is etched in my mind.

I miss you, so full of life.

Cooking and sewing and crafting, always excelling at everything.

I miss your handmade handwritten cards.

And I cherish them so much.

For graduation I received the last card you ever gave anyone.

You had long since stopped making and writing the cards yourself, yet I value it more than any of the rest.

In my mind, it's where my love of handwritten letters stems from.

From you.

I got that part of me from you.

I'm so lucky,

To have known you at all.

To have your example in my life.

To call you family.

I miss you. I guess that is all that I really wanted to say. I miss you and I have had some hard times in my life since you left, and I really just wish you were here to tell me what to do. To help me figure things out. To see the person I have become. And to watch me continue to grow into the person I hope to someday become, because I know if I could become half the person you were I would be okay. I love you and I miss you and I hope to make you proud. And I guess I just wanted you to know that!