Skip to main content

Every Day Is A Battle

Every day is a battle. Some days I win and some days I lay my head down at night and think "I will try again tomorrow." Life is hard and it was meant to be that way. But even with that knowledge and understanding it is still sometimes a struggle to get through. I am at the point where everything is bothering me. And it is little stupid things and the worst part is that in the back of my head I know that I am being ridiculous. I know that I am over reacting and that I should not be so irritated by these things. But I am. I am bothered by stupid little things. And I don't really know what to do to make that go away. I don't want to push away these people in my life because they are good people. But at the same time I get so angry when I am there and I just cant figure it out. School is crazy right now, and I just started working again, which is great but also rough because that is one more thing I need to worry about. I have a great group of friends that I love spending time with and yet that is part of this whole stupid problem! I don't want to do homework. I don't want to study for my tests that I have in the next two weeks (which by the way there are serious risks of me failing some of them so that's just awesome). On top of ALL of that I am constantly doubting everything in my life. It's to the point where I doubt my doubts. What the freak is that. I am stressed most of the time which means my immune system takes a hit so I feel crummy all the time. I am always tired. Always. And it is cold so my feet and body ache, constantly.
Every day is a battle and lately it seems like I keep on losing.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Why I Drove to Washington By Myself

Okay first things first....I went to WA to see my friend Liz. Look how cute she is! She got a grown up job and moved to the *cutest* little town in WA and I miss her, so I took a few days for myself and went on a trip to see her. Secondly, I want it to be known that I DID invite a friend to come with me. I have a good friend who I would have loved to have join me on the trip, but when he couldn't come I was sad but didn't bat an eye. Here are the reasons that I invited him: He is excellent company. He has a great taste in music. He is friends with Liz as well. I thought it would be fun if he came. The end that is all. I didn't invite him to make the trip cheaper, to help drive, or to make me feel safer. It would have been fun if he could have come, but either way I was going to go. I drove to Washington by myself because I could. Because I am saying YES. Because I am done waiting for "someday".  Someday when I have more money, or...

I Know I Have Dreams

It's been a while since I have written anything on here. And I know it's been a while. I know that the last few weeks have been crazy, and that that is part of it. But I also know that I have sat down to write here more times than I would care to admit. I know that I have a million thoughts running around in my head. I know that I want to figure out how to let the words out and have them make sense. I know I have all these ideas about what I want to do with my life, what I want to accomplish, and who I want to become, and yet I lack the knowledge of how to get there. I know I have dreams. I know I want to be somebody that people can look up too someday. I know what I love. I know I have to make choices. I know that I ramble. A lot. I know a lot of things. Maybe I will talk about everything. Maybe I will save a post or two for another day. I know that this post is going to be long.  I know that this post may be very varied when it comes to topics. I know that n...

How True This Is