Skip to main content

Tonight I Feel Broken.

Not completely, but a little bit yeah. I am so tired, my eyes are heavy and they burn. I have no desire to do anything at this point. It's cold and my body just sort of hurts. We've gotten snow the last two days and I am not a fan. Last night I got a phone call from my Father. Apparently my parents haven't been talking to each other about some things in my life the way I had hoped. I sat on my floor a sobbed talking to my Dad on the phone. I miss him. Not only is he my Dad, but he's one of my best friends and favorite people to be around. We had a very good talk and it helped me a lot...or so I thought. I then spent the night watching a movie and hanging out with some friends. It was great. I cant explain the love I feel when I am with such wonderful people. I went to bed last night just as confused as I the night before, just as confused as I will tonight. It's hard. My Mom keeps telling me I can do hard things. Today she made me promise that when I doubt myself or am struggling, to repeat that in my head. "I can do hard things." I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things....
Tonight I feel broken, just a little bit cracked. I know things will come together, I know I will get through, I know I can do hard things. I just want answers. I just want sleep. I just want someone to wrap me up in a hug that lasts forever. I just want to feel less alone.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

I Know I Have Dreams

It's been a while since I have written anything on here. And I know it's been a while. I know that the last few weeks have been crazy, and that that is part of it. But I also know that I have sat down to write here more times than I would care to admit. I know that I have a million thoughts running around in my head. I know that I want to figure out how to let the words out and have them make sense. I know I have all these ideas about what I want to do with my life, what I want to accomplish, and who I want to become, and yet I lack the knowledge of how to get there. I know I have dreams. I know I want to be somebody that people can look up too someday. I know what I love. I know I have to make choices. I know that I ramble. A lot. I know a lot of things. Maybe I will talk about everything. Maybe I will save a post or two for another day. I know that this post is going to be long.  I know that this post may be very varied when it comes to topics. I know that n...

How True This Is

I Resolve To Continue

This is the time of year when we evaluate our lives. We look at the last 364 days and ponder on our struggles and our triumphs. We look at the person we have become over the last 12 months and we plan to do better in the coming 12. This is the time of year we are dedicated to making a change, and as I sit here thinking back to this time exactly 365 days ago, I am astounded at how far I have come. Almost ashamed of the person I was then and truly proud of the person I am now. For one of the first times in my life I can say that I can see myself becoming the person I want to become. In the last year I have felt sorrow and defeat and loneliness. I have faced struggles and heartache and frustrations. But I have also felt peace. I have felt joy and happiness and love. I set goals and I achieved them. I have had experiences that have taught me so many valuable lessons, and I have met people who have changed me forever. And I am so grateful. And so as we finish out this awfully beautiful year...