Today I took my kid brother to the park down the street from our house. We got there and I found a seat on a bench because he immediately ran off to start playing. Normally I would run and play with him but today I just sat and watched. Right away he started playing with these two little kids (a brother and sister) and I found myself almost being jealous of them as they ran around in an imaginary world that they all found themselves in together. They were playing and laughing and were instant best friends. As I sat there watching them run and play my mind couldn't help but wander a little bit. I thought about where I am at in life and little things that are daily experiences back at school. I thought about people in my life, and I thought about the many thousands of strangers I pass each day without even really knowing it. I thought about how hard it is for me to meet people and make friends at the age of 21, and found myself jealous of these elementary kids who were insta-friends on the playground. There was no judgement being passed, and no need for anyone to impress others or be something they weren't. They were being their honest true selves and they were completely accepting. Why can't we keep that? Why do we let that go? And why can my little brother make friends so easily when I struggle so much? I sat there for about an hour or so, and I then we walked home. I didn't leave with any answers, but a thought that maybe things would be a lot better in this world if we all remembered what it was like to be a little kid, playing on the play ground with our new best friends.
It's been a while since I have written anything on here. And I know it's been a while. I know that the last few weeks have been crazy, and that that is part of it. But I also know that I have sat down to write here more times than I would care to admit. I know that I have a million thoughts running around in my head. I know that I want to figure out how to let the words out and have them make sense. I know I have all these ideas about what I want to do with my life, what I want to accomplish, and who I want to become, and yet I lack the knowledge of how to get there. I know I have dreams. I know I want to be somebody that people can look up too someday. I know what I love. I know I have to make choices. I know that I ramble. A lot. I know a lot of things. Maybe I will talk about everything. Maybe I will save a post or two for another day. I know that this post is going to be long. I know that this post may be very varied when it comes to topics. I know that n...
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